Bonding With Your Baby
Preparing for Parenthood
Bonding is the intense attachment or trust that develops between parents and their baby. It is that overwhelming feeling that makes parents shower their baby with love and affection and protect and nourish them. A baby’s healthy development is truly dependent on the establishment of a healthy bond with another person. Most babies and parents find it easy to bond immediately. For some parents, bonding may take longer if baby or mom has medical issues or mom is exhausted from a long birth. Bonding can even take time for parents who have just adopted a baby.
For many new families, bonding is simply a by-product of everyday care-giving such as feeding and diapering. Amazingly, hormones play a large part in the bonding process. Oxytocin, Prolactin, Endorphins and ACTH are hormones that spring into action to assist in the bonding process after giving birth. Hormones are tricky, because they can also inhibit bonding as well, such as when a mother begins to suffer from post-partum depression.
Bonding is a word that is thrown around quite frequently today. Women get together to bond on a “girls night out” and husbands and wives have a “date night” to bond and reconnect after working. Bonding for babies, however, is critical for healthy development. The connection that is established gives them a sense of security and positive self-esteem as well as boosts their social and cognitive growth. In studies conducted with monkeys where there was a lack of parental bonding, the monkeys suffered such negative effects as, stunted development, extreme sadness and failure to thrive. Scientists believe that lack of bonding in human babies often results in the same negative outcomes.
How can I bond with my baby? Here are several trusted ways to promote and enhance the bond between you and your baby. Lying with your baby skin-to-skin as well as learning infant massage are two great ways to bond. Massaging your baby using firm massage strokes promotes relaxation and releases some of those bonding hormones. Amazingly, within two days of birth, babies can recognize the smell of their mother, which is further enhanced by nursing and skin-to-skin contact. Securing eye-to-eye contact with your infant will provide meaningful communication that can be shared while feeding, diapering and bathing your baby. Talk to your baby. Babies respond to human voices and enjoy vocalizing which is their first attempt at communication. Bed sharing is another effective way to bond. Sleeping with your baby, safely in your bed, not only increases the emotional connection between parent and baby, but makes night care easier and increases the amount of sleep for both baby and caregiver. Bedsharing is also great for dads who work all day and desire intimate bonding time with their babies when they get home.
Carrying your baby in a sling, a wrap, or a baby carrier is beneficial for you, your baby, and your whole family. Babywearing promotes bonding between the baby and the wearer. The benefits of babywearing are many. Wearing your baby helps you develop a secure mutual attachment. Babywearing increases parental awareness to a baby’s needs and simulates the sensations of pressure, motion, warmth, and security of the womb as well as giving babies the message that they are safe, secure, and loved.
There are many wonderful ways to bond and further develop a secure attachment with your baby. From massage to bedsharing to babywearing, parents have many options to develop and nurture one of the most meaningful, important relationships in their life and that of their baby.
