Let’s start with thoughts we can agree on. Don’t you agree that there are opposite energies that balance each other out? Active and Passive? Ying and Yang, Light and Dark? Positive and Negative? Up and Down? Each is defined by the other. Can you imagine one side of the Ying Yang without the other? It wouldn’t be balanced. It would fall over and be something else. Active would just be nothing without Passive to compare it to. Together, they define each other.
Given that there are opposite energies that balance each other, can you agree that both are necessary? Neither is better than the other? There is a time and place for both active and passive behavior, for both dark and for light, for positive space and negative space. You couldn’t understand one unless it was in relationship with the other. That is what makes each beneficial, the reflection it creates for the opposite.
In our society, Active, Ying, Light and Positive are associated with masculine energy. They are judged as good. Doing something is valuable. And sometimes it is. Passive, Yang, Dark and Negative energy are associated with feminine energy. They are often seen as less than, Being isn’t as valued. It certainly isn’t rewarded financially. Wouldn’t it be interesting to be paid more for being patient, for being kind, for being loving. Often it is the “doing” that brings the financial gain. I believe that the balance of both doing and being brings the greatest reward overall.
So what does this have to do with birth? I contend that young women of childbearing age have been raised with the belief that they could do whatever they want in their life, fostering the strength of their male energy. They have been encouraged to acquire and share in the financial benefits of their male counterparts. Women who missed the benefits of the feminist movement raised daughters with the beliefs that they themselves couldn’t utilize. Knowledge is power, take control, “you are the editor of your life”. These are all powerful and helpful thoughts.
And now these young women are having babies. Some are scheduling cesareans; others want to micromanage every aspect of this sacred time called pregnancy. It’s hard to switch gears when you have been one way for so long.
What’s the alternative? I believe that the time when a woman is pregnant is a perfect time to practice the balance of both masculine and feminine energy. What would that look like?
The masculine energy would include reading books from authors that support your personal philosophy*, talking to different caregivers so that you are supported in your desires by a like minded doctor or midwife, exercising, (pre-natal yoga is great) and choosing other healthy, life affirming habits.
Feminine energy would include trusting your instincts about your health, resting when you are tired, only listening to stories that support your desires (no war stories), imagining your perfect birth and feeling the excitement associated with that. Knowing that you were designed for birthing and allowing your baby to feel safe and loved within the confines of your body, sharing your “being-ness” with your baby by talking to it and placing your hands on your belly, listening to what your baby is saying to you.
By using both energies in balance you can stand centered and make the best decisions for you and your baby. You and your partner will know when to be active and when to be passive.
And then it’s time for the birthing. This is when the feminine energy shines. The power in allowing your body to do what it knows how to do is stunning. It is an amazing process that you can almost watch from above when you have a deep trust. You don’t have to do anything but get out of the way. Witnessing this miracle is a blessing for which you will want to be present. No drugs, no fog to keep you from the power of the moment. Honoring the feminine energy at this time is the key to a beautiful, natural birth which includes clear initial bonding with your child as you welcome him or her into this world. Attention to these details is an amazing investment in the future of your family.
I believe these things so strongly and am honored to find a vehicle with which to share them. HypnoBirthing Classes, Childbirth Education for a Natural Childbirth is my vehicle. To learn more you may visit my website at www.natural-mama.net or call me at (203) 558-0370.
*Recommended books are on the above mentioned website.