Preparing for Natural Childbirth
The Confidence Factor
Most
women in the U.S. today are worried about their impending labor - will
they be able to do it naturally…or not? Usually conversations with
women expecting their first baby will go as follows…
"Are you having your baby naturally?" "I'm going to try and go natural."
The confidence is missing from this answer. What about a more positive
approach: "Yes, I'm having a natural birth."
Women are very doubtful if they can do labor and tolerate contractions.
Instead of the confidence factor empowering them to birth, they are filled
with the "fear factor". I wonder if any of the reality TV
show participants from Fear Factor would back away if going through labor
was one of the daredevil feats.
All doubt needs to be wiped away. Fear, doubt, hesitation, and worry can stand in the way of birth. Our minds have a power over our bodies that we don't fully understand. A woman's mind can hold off labor, making her overdue if she is fearful of labor. Her mind can also shut off labor after it has started if fear creeps in. Even animals will stop laboring if they fear that their environment is unsafe.
In our society, women are not brought up around birth; it is not a way of life anymore. Just a little over a hundred years ago most women birthed at home and had 6 or 8 children. Their mothers, daughters, sisters, friends, and neighbors, not to mention the local midwife or house-calling doctor came over to help the laboring woman. A lot of love and support was given to her from many. Then these women, in turn, helped other women to birth when their labor pains began. Birth was not foreign to them. They knew what to expect when they were expecting and didn't have to go read a book or take a class. They saw natural birth happening right in front of them and knew that a woman could get through it and that it wouldn't last forever. There was a beginning and an end. Without interventions, they saw labor move along smoothly with a pattern of passionate peaks and tranquil trenches. They saw the power coming from these laboring women - a knowing strength confidently leading them to the next contraction. Women trusted in their body's ability to birth. Twentieth century women have lost this trust. Most women trust in their ability to perform the act of making love, their ability to conceive, their ability to grow a baby within them, and their ability to carry their baby to term. Why not continue that trust in their ability to labor and birth? Now their only exposure to birth comes from the media's portrayal of it — no wonder they are filled with fear.
In my childbirth classes, I teach a lot on confidence-building, incorporating affirmations and emotional preparation, as well as my lengthy list of "Labor Yes-I-Cans". Confidence is one of the three points of the perfect labor triangle. The other two are having a basic birthing knowledge and obtaining the relaxation tools needed for natural birth. Sure, it's easy to instruct women in knowledge and relaxation tools, but if I can instill confidence in them, then I have done my job well. They have to dig deep and discover their own treasure chest full of confidence and power and have it unlocked before labor sets sail and the waves get rough - but they have to want to find this treasure to make their birthing dreams come true.
Women who go through labor naturally are totally empowered by the whole experience. They are blown away by their body's ability to help God in a miracle. The strong presence of confidence and trust in labor is absolutely necessary for a natural birth. The importance of developing these essential components during pregnancy far outweighs anything else that you could be doing to plan for your birth. With a natural birth comes a lasting empowerment. Women are transformed by it and are strengthened by it. I challenge all of you women who are expecting to develop your confidence factor to its fullest and transform your conversations into a more assuring, positive approach. It is now time to say, very loudly, (so other women will hear), and with your chin held up high, your eyes sparkling with anticipation, and with a truly confident smile upon your face, "Yes, I'm having a natural birth!"
